Let’s face it: Weddings are expensive, and they take a lot of work to plan. Determining the right number of wedding guests to be on your list will be your biggest worry AND your toughest task. So when you think about it, why should you invite someone if they aren’t really all that important to you? I came up with a few people that you might want to really think hard about inviting…or not.

#1 Children

Bless their little souls. This is almost always a controversial topic. You either love ‘em or you don’t. And you have to invite all or none – not just certain ones.  Decide up-front whether or not you want to invite kids (oh – and work out what age bracket that covers) to your celebration and let guests know ASAP so they have time to organise childcare.

Some might feel strongly and decide they don’t want to attend if their children can’t come along as well, in which case – so sorry, we’ll miss you! Once you’ve reached your decision, stay the course.

#2 Anyone you haven’t spoken to in years.

I know you had lots of friends during college/university days, but if you haven’t stayed in touch since you graduated, there’s no obligation to include them as your wedding guests. And that friend who’s really kind-of-not your friend – the one who follows you on Facebook or Instagram but that’s the extent of your relationship – no obligation there either.

#3 Relatives you haven’t seen in years 

If you’re tight on space or trying desperately to stick to your budget, you’ll need to be firm here. Pressure from your parents or other close family members can influence you but sometimes you just need to say no.

Stick to the policy that if you haven’t seen them in years, you probably won’t offend them; and if you do – well – you haven’t seen them in years anyway right?  Keeping a tight rein on your number of wedding guests can be a full time job.

Wedding guests celebrating

How many is too many at your wedding?

#4 Your colleagues/parent’s friends

Just because you talk about your wedding plans in the office, it doesn’t mean you owe them an invite. If you’re close to them, include them.  If not, don’t feel you’re under pressure to invite them.

Parent’s friends – Allow each set of parents a certain number (what your budget and space allow) of friends to invite and it really helps if you know them too.

#5 Plus-ones you’ve never met before

There’s a simple policy here if you’re limited for space: unless they’re a close friend or relative, no plus-one obligations here. Your best friend’s current fling: Obviously you love your best friend, but don’t feel obligated to give her/him a plus one unless things are serious between them.


When it comes to drawing up your wedding guest list, you’ll need to remember that your budget and venue are two important deciding factors on the size. If they both allow for more guests, feel free to invite anyone that you think deserves an invite. There may also be a few people who would not be able to attend at all, but would be very disappointed if they did not receive an invite. Use your best judgment when deciding who to cut and who to keep. If there seems to be too many people that you cannot remove from the list, consider having an intimate wedding ceremony and reception and host a larger party for everyone else at a later time.

Want this info in a smaller version? Click here for our FREE Infographic on 5 Quick Tips for trimming your Wedding Guest List.  Please feel free to leave any comments below about how you are keeping your wedding guest list under control.

Want to know more or find out what Wedding Coaching is all about, check out my website at:

Nancy – Wedding Coach


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Nancy Curtis

Nancy (that's me) is a Kickass Virtual Wedding Planner whose goal is to give every bride the opportunity to plan their wedding with as little stress as possible. Is that something you would like to do? Step by step, I show you how to plan the wedding of your dreams without having to spend countless hours or put yourself in debt. I believe with the right plan for your wedding, you can have that special day you've been dreaming of and enjoy every step of the way. Would you like more information about HOW I can help reduce the stress and overwhelm in your wedding planning? Drop me a line with your details using my CONTACT FORM HERE and I'll follow up with your promptly. And in the meantime, while you're waiting, get started with your wedding planning by Downloading my FREE 6 Simple Steps to Get you Down the Aisle and Keep you Sane Planning Guide to avoid the overwhelm in your wedding planning. Happy Planning!

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